People say that change is inevitable. And while that may be true, it doesn’t mean I have to like it. I’m no radical. In fact, I might be the last person you might think to invite to the revolution.
For example, all of my life I have brushed my teeth with Crest and showered with Zest. Some might call it being stuck in a rut. I call it loyalty. Recently, all of the local stores stopped carrying the variety of Zest I liked. But we were all out of soap and so, against my better judgment, we took a step on the wild side and bought a new brand of soap. It wasn’t an easy choice. I had to sniff and read every package on the shelf before making such a momentous alteration to the status quo. For the next two weeks I itched every time I got out of the shower.
I told myself I was allergic to the soap. Actually, I suspect it was an allergic reaction to change.
For me, change goes against my grain, and – when it does occur – it usually happens against my will and against all odds.
It doesn’t help matters that, in terms of age, I have reached what some might consider “old dog” status…as in those who can’t be taught any new tricks. And I should also mention that I was raised in the evangelical American church and have been, for most of my years, deeply immersed in that life. Church people have a somewhat justified reputation for not being predisposed to change, especially those who hail from the Midwest where I have my roots.
Now, given the facts with which you have been presented, you would be perfectly justified if you were to conclude that I am a fairly conservative, set-in-my-ways person who accepts things that fall within his comfort zone pretty much as they are, without much of an interest in seeing those things altered. And, in all honestly, that sounds like a reasonably accurate description.
But, much to my surprise, some things within me are changing. These changes are making it uncomfortable for me inside my comfort zone and they are unsettling to my settled convictions. And I am discovering that these changes seem to be so fundamental to what it is that I am becoming, that it is virtually impossible to imagine going back to where I have been.
And so, reluctantly, I find myself in the midst of a personal revolution. Paradigms are shifting underfoot even as I write this. I am asking questions and exploring prospective answers that would have seemed unthinkable a short time ago.
Recently, I was part of a group of cars headed to a destination. In my possession I had a map that I had printed off the internet. It provided some really clear directions to our objective. But as we pulled away from our starting point, I got involved in a conversation that was really engrossing. So, instead of following the directions I had printed out, I decided to just follow the car in front of me since we were both headed to the same destination.
What I didn’t know was that the other driver was a little lost. So we proceeded to snake our way through an unfamiliar part of town until we finally came upon a familiar road. We got where we were going, but a good bit behind the other vehicles.
Well, in a manner of speaking, for most of my life I have been guided by following the taillights of others whom I gave credit for knowing the way. But now, after decades of letting them lead the way, I am stepping up and acknowledging that I am responsible for the path I follow, and no one else. And, what’s more, the recent record of some of those whom I have followed is patchy enough to suggest that they are following some maps of questionable reliability.
So things look a little differently now as I drive off with only a small company of travelling companions along some less-travelled roads. But one thing hasn’t changed: my objective. I still want to be a faithful apprentice to Jesus. I still very much want to grow in the way that I reflect his life in mine. And this blog is the journal of my journey.
It’s not a journey that I desire to take on my own, so you are very welcome to come along.
